YOU CANNOT HEAL BY GOING BACK TO WHAT BROKE YOU

We cry when we get hurt. It takes a little bit of time to heal. Some people take weeks, months or even years to get over something that broke them. It will take a whole lot of effort to pick up the pieces and glue yourself back together. This is just one of the few consequences of letting your guards down. 

You’ll feel like there’s nothing left for you. Because you’ve given your everything, it’s hard to picture a tomorrow without that missing piece. It will feel like that for a while. Some people get over it, some just get used to it. It’s a matter of how you deal with it to still function or how you want people to see you. 

Fake it til you make it. When you walk around making it obvious that you’ve been hurt, people will ask. People ask either because they’re concerned, but really some people ask just because they’re nosy. Which is true 80% of the time. So sometimes, putting a front, smiling your way to recovery helps a lot. It helps trick your mind that you’re happy. People will stop asking, and the more you don’t talk about what broke you, the faster you heal. 

You will not heal by going back to what broke you.  After getting hurt, you do your best to glue yourself back in place. You do things you’ve never done before and you start to venture outside your comfort zone for the sake of your own sanity and recovery. Hoping there’s really something out there for you and start to believe it. It took you so much to get where you are and then one day, all that is threathened by a knock from the past. It’s a disaster in disguise. Some people won’t see it coming and they get sucked back in. Just like that. But a few will learn what the differences between what’s better and what’s not. Hopefully, you choose not to get drowned like before. 

Everyday is a challenge. But knowing you’re getting yourself back should be more than enough of a motivation. Because you belong to you first and you deserve yourself before someone else. 

Advertisements

HEARTS DO NOT BREAK EVEN

I have only been around for twenty two years and I know I have learned quiet a decent amount of wisdom and lessons. One of those is the fact that hearts do not break even. Everybody wants closure right? When it comes to separation especially. Good or bad. Closure is one of the things that people do not really get a lot when going through a break up. That’s why a lot of us hang on for too long. We wait around. Still hopeful. 

Someone could break your heart today, and then move on tomorrow like nothing ever happened to them, while you’re in bed crying your heart out and over thinking about what you could’ve done differently. 

So, what do we do? Well first, you’ve got to admit that things just happen. Sometimes for no reason at all. No justifying or you’ll spend your life questioning every little thing that happens to you. Sometimes, things just happen. So, it’s possible  that he just woke up and realized he didn’t want to be with you? Yes. Oh yes. So.. Take that as your closure and go. Run while you can. 

Take a good look at yourself. After that, ask yourself if you’re proud of how you are, or pay attention to every little details of your face. Pamper yourself. You’ve given your best. You don not deserve by less than that. 

Chin up and look forward. Doesn’t mean jump into another person. Breathe in and out. Run. Take care of yourself. Sooner or later, you’ll meet the one who will treat you how you want to be treated. 

Do not settle for less just because you’re scared to be alone. The best is worth the wait. Keep your standards high. You won’t be alone forever. Use this time to reflect and appreciate yourself. 

HOW MUCH IS YOUR WEDDING RING? 

How much should a wedding ring cost? Well. If you ask me, I say more than thousands. More than millions. It is almost out of reach. But the beauty of it is that only two people can know. People are out here, especially the celebrities. Not that I am hating, but I really think money divert people’s attention from what truly matters. 

Wedding rings, engagement rings or promise rings aren’t just metal that hugs around your fourth finger. It’s a promise that money can never afford. When you see a ring, when someone presents you the ring. Pay attention to the person, and not so much at how much or how big the stone is. It’s a reminder. That’s all. 

PRECIOUS 4 AM THOUGHT

It’s four in the morning, I am sitting in silence, waiting for my precious little baby to fall in deep sleep. It’s quiet and my husband is fast asleep. I remember the first two weeks of being home after giving birth. I was exhausted. Naive but excited all at once.  having close to zero confidence about motherhood. Two weeks ago I wanted to cry and break down whenever my newborn cried. Yes, I did some pretty crazy research. Read baby books. But when this child cried infront of me, it was like standing  in a huge arena. Me against this child. All those research flew out the window. I guess you can say motherhood bitch slapped me in the face and the funny thing was that it wasn’t even half of it. I had no clue what I was in for. I thought I did. I was a zombie. Still am but I am managing. I doubted my abilities. I almost thought of giving up. I was afraid. That was two weeks ago. Although I still have no idea what I’m doing most of the time, I got to know this child. He mirrors my husband and I. It’s amazing how love can create such precious little human. Now I stare at him when he sleeps. I always do. And I am amazed of the fact that I was capable of nurturing him. I love him more than anything in this world. I am not ashamed of how I feel about this whole situation as a first time mother. I feel protective.. Most of the time I get a little too over protective actually. I fall in love over and over again when I look at him. I am nowhere near scared any longer. He’s mine.  He’s precious. He makes me love life even more. He brings my husband and I even closer than before. And I know this doesn’t end here. 

APPRECIATE HOME

Often times many people take their homes for granted. Today I woke up to the smell breakfast. I woke up to the smell of coffee and bacon, and then pancakes. I woke up to my mother telling us that breakfast is almost ready. I woke up in warm sheets of blankets. I smiled. And then I thought of the ones who take these things for granted. I thought of the ones who did not wake up to the same scenery that I woke up to this morning. I sympathize them. In hopes that they would realize the value of having a home. And go home. Don’t take it for granted. Or stop taking it for granted. Because not everybody gets to have something to call a home. Not a lot of people feel warm waking up. Not a lot of people gets to eat breakfast. 

WHEN TO NOT SAY ANYTHING AT ALL

Society will tell you that you’re too skinny. Society will tell you that you’re too fat. Society will make it seem like there is no in between. And then we try to fix it by saying “love yourself for who and what you are. ” but turn around and body shame body types that contradict ours. Why can’t we just say everybody is beautiful without bias? Or why can’t you not say it if you don’t mean it. I think that’s better. If you do not think someone is attractive, then keep it to yourself. We need to encourage peace and love. We need to encourage girls to embrace their own body type. So let them. Just because you don’t think someone is attractive because of their figure, doesn’t mean other people see them the same way. And don’t feel terrible if you don’t find someone attractive by their figure because we all are entitled to our own opinion. I’m not saying you should try to sugar coat things. I’m just saying that if you don’t have any nice things to say, then don’t say anything at all.