Despite of all the pain you have caused me, doesn’t erased the fact that I still loved you and you still played a very important role in my life. You’ve made me realize things that nobody could have. Because of how I felt towards you, I took things to the extreme. Which should always be the case no matter what it came about. You also taught me the importance of expressing my feelings, and that it’s better to say too much than nothing at all. I could go on and on. I could try to justify how I felt today and now. I could try to convince myself that all the amazing things in the past is just nonsense or that I should probably forget. But I won’t. I think this is great and I think this is part of the process of becoming a better person. I think this is a test. How I handle this will affect the person I will be after I am through with this chapter. I think that everything will make sense later. So I thank you. I thank you for everything.
YOU SCARED HIM AWAY
You sit there and say all you have done is love him and care for him. You sit there and wonder why he suddenly went from hot to cold and why he became so indifferent. You cry, you run to your friends and tell them all about it. You tell them how much effort you have put in and time you have invested in him. Then you ask how can he leave someone like you. You are a keeper and he would never find another woman like you. You have got all it takes to be a wonderful woman and even thought about being with him forever.
But you forgot to think about him and what he wanted. He wanted support not questioning everytime he came home from work. He wanted you to ask him how his day was, not who he was with or who the girl was in his office and make a big deal out of it. He wanted trust, but you wanted to take his privacy away by always wanting to go through his phone. He wanted a strong woman to stand by his side and succeed with him but instead you were a responsibility and a chore. He always had to put a front even when he was tired because you wanted to feel special but really you were not thinking about him. He got tired. You ate still pretty in his eyes. But you made him choose and you scared him away.