Hello everyone! My little Prince Charming is exactly a week old now. This week has been one of the longest weeks that I’ve ever had. Getting to know my little pooch and still adjusting. While my hormones go loco, I am over here doing my best to get a hold of myself. Wish me luck in the near future! 


How long until the day you get over him? The moment you decide to. That could be ten years from now when you finally get tired of hoping. Or that could be in the next ten seconds. It’s really all about you.  Nobody else. It’s you who control your own mind and what can go in it. It’s you who control and decide what you think about every second of the day. So you ask, when? The real question is when do you want to get over him? When you finally say and decide enough. When you finally tell yourself you need to get on something else or you’ll spend your life crying about someone. That will be the day of the beginning of you getting over someone. Time is not going to heal you unless you let it. That means you have to decide when. 


Why are you worried about getting noticed more than you should be craving for respect? Generally speaking, I sometimes feel like the world is starting to flip upside down. You’re showing a perfectly opposite example of what you should be showing the future generation. How is it going to be? One day, respect will be something no one will even recognize. Isn’t that scary and sickening? You’re so desperate about getting attention to the point where you forget you’re even a person. A human that should be respected. Not a thing, not a piece of meat that men can hump and leave when they’re done. Not someone people will use. You’re not a walking circus. Stop acting like one. 


Fast replies make me think you actually want to talk to me. But slow replies make me think that you’re talking to someone better. I don’t know why. I seem to have attached my soul to you. It’s shameful and I don’t like feeling this dependent on someone. Let alone let my happiness depend on a person. I have read so many rules when it comes to relationships and happiness. They all say the same. To not let your happiness be dependent on someone. It’s probably the dumbest thing you can do. Well, here I am. I thought I stood firmly by those words and articles but here I am. Weak as hell and feeling like the dumbest person on earth. How did I not see it coming? I have no idea. It caught me off guard. I actually thought I was doing fine, and I am the strongest person when it comes to having pride. But then whatever it is, life maybe? Never fails to prove me wrong. 


No matter how angry you get, you always end up forgiving the person you love. Why? That’s the same question most people ask and to be honest, I don’t even know why… Not yet anyway. But I have my own answers. Just to justify my actions and why I forgive the people I love most. Now when I say this, this doesn’t mean I let people step all over me. Of course, I know my worth. I would never let anyone cheat on me or dehumanize me. Of course, I assess the situation. Always. I forgive the people I love because in every situation, after contemplating of its worth losing the person, the answer is always no.  I forgive the people I love not only because I simply love them, but because despite of what happened or what they did, they make life worth it. I also believe that you being in that situation kind of tests your love for others. 


My idea of “rock bottom” is waiting 15 minutes for a guy to text back. Oh, no not starving to death, or running out to money in my savings bank account. Not the zombie apocalypse either. Just simply waiting… Waiting for a guy to text back. Judge me alright. I don’t even know why this is so important to me. Maybe because I like him. And I’m hoping he likes me too. Because I mean, I just feel it. And even if he doesn’t, maybe I can make him. And why wouldn’t he? I think I’m pretty enough.. I know I would be a great girlfriend. Not that he even asked, but sooner or later he will see my worth. Yes, I feel a little shame in the back of my head. One brain cell, maybe two are screaming at me saying I look dumb. Telling me how I shouldn’t behave. That I look like a puppy waiting for my owner to throw food at me. Maybe I’m okay with it. I’m just feeling really hopeful and I will probably regret this later.